Episode #19 - A Fish Tale ("Help, I'm A Fish" or "Hjælp, jeg er en fisk")
Stephanie and Aaron are joining us!
Oscar: “A few days ago we wandered into the DVD sale at Movie Works up the street. Aaron essentially badgered me into buying this. It appears to be a European knockoff of Shark Tale, which in turn is an American ripoff of Finding Nemo. I think this might hurt.”
Andy: They did it Han way! (0:00)
Oscar: Is this an Ingmar Bergman film? (0:00)
Jackie: I think we made a mistake here (0:00)
Andy: Here’s the Alan Rickman credit
Oscar: Terry Jones…
Aaron: Watch them not credit anyone else.
They don’t
All: Yeah! (0:01)
Jackie: Watch the entire soundtrack be like this.
Aaron: If this doesn’t reel in the kids I don’t know what will. (0:01)
Aaron: Holy shit it’s animated!
Andy: This is cell animation!
Aaron: This must be the last cell animated movie. (0:03)
Stacey: It’s half-animated.
Oscar: It’s like Futurama, only shitty.
Aaron: Isn’t this what Treasure Planet did… and it tanked? (0:05)
Andy: Hey, a floppy disk. What year is this? (0:04)
Aaron: Stellllaaa! (0:06)
Aaron: Holy shit the Lion King rock!
Jackie: It’s pride rock!
Oscar: They just have the rejected Disney footage. (0:07)
Andy: Where did they fall?
Oscar: Into Teh Goonies. (0:08)
Jackie: Wow, they’re just gonna keep switching movies on us, aren’t they? (0:08)
Andy: Guys, this came out in 2000. Finding Nemo came out in 2003.
Aaron: So Shark Tale ripped of this and Finding Nemo? Dreamworks sucks. (0:10)
Oscar: An Inconvenient Truth!
Aaron: This predates that movie too.
Jackie: This movie was predicting all of these. (0:10)
Aaron: Holy shit, this has songs? (0:11)
Stephanie couldn’t take it anymore. Bye, Stephanie!
Oscar: Now it’s Back to the Future!
Andy: Back to the Flounder?
Oscar: Ugh. (0:13)
Andy: She took acid! (0:13)
All: Stella! (0:14)
Oscar: He sounds like Jason from Home Movies. (0:15)
Aaron: Wow, is it possible that none of the movie is going to look like the terrible CGI on the cover? (0:16)
Oscar: She kind of looks like the violator from Spawn.
Aaron: Best babysitter ever. (0:17)
All: Stella! (0:17)
Oscar: Hey, there’s Alan Rickman. (0:17)
Andy: If Alan Rickman sings this entire movie will be worth it. (0:18)
Jackie: I wonder what the kind of fish they turn into tells you about them. (0:21)
Oscar: She, uh, seems to be taking this in stride.
Aaron: Well, children are adaptable.
Oscar: She just drank a potion, had a psychedelic experience, turned into a starfish… (0:23)
All: Uuuuugh. (0:21)
Stacey: She’s a starfish - she can eat her way out of that.
Andy: So if she loses a limb, does she become two Stella? (0:25)
Oscar: He is such a dick! (0:26)
Aaron: Hey, it’s the Fifth Element.
Oscar:
Aaron: It’s Blade Runner. (0:28)
Oscar: So, they’re obviously trying to paint Joe to be a villian, but right now he looks like a savior. (0:29)
Oscar: It’s pretty safe to say these guys saw the Lion King.
Aaron: It’s pretty safe to say these guys saw a Disney movie.
Andy: Alan Rickman is singing!
Jackie: It’s “Be Prepared!”
Oscar: It’s a Europop “Be Prepared.”
Aaron: I wonder how many people on the Internet have seen Alan Rickman singing over Europop. (0:31)
Andy: The jellyfish kinda sounds like Milton. (0:34)
Jackie: Is it Pride Rock again?
Andy: Nah, it’s Scuttle’s Rock. (0:35)
Oscar: “I’m not even supposed to be here today!”
Jackie: He really is a cross between Dante and Randall. (0:37)
Oscar: Those guys wouldn’t be in the water. Those are tortoises. (0:38)
Aaron: Wow, it’s a good thing that kid brought 100 yards of fishing line. (0:40)
Oscar: “The sun rising on my empire” sounds like an expression a fish wouldn’t make. (0:40)
Jackie: Why is the bottle so tiny now, by the way? (0:42)
Andy: “Water under the bridge” is another expression a fish wouldn’t know. (0:43)
All: Whaaaat?
Oscar: Aw, fuck. (0:44)
Aaron: Watch them rap the lyrics here.
Lyrics start rapping
Aaron: Yeah!
Jackie: Why don’t you predict something good to happen?
Aaron: Hey, I already shortened the opening credit and made this cell animation, what do you want from me? (0:45)
Jackie: Wait, this has only been one day? Alan Rickman did all this in one day?
Oscar: He built a civilization. In a day.
Jackie: And a mass transit system. (0:49)
Stacey: Little steamboat! I want a little steamboat. (0:50)
All: Stellaa!!! (0:51)
Andy: That vial… is transparent… right now. (0:52)
All: Woooah.
Jackie: It’s like that last fight in the Lion King. (0:53)
Fly: Do twisters happen underwater?
Aaron: No, but here’s one anyway.
Jackie: Even the characters are questioning this plot device. (0:56)
Oscar: I like how they had him out of shot, so they didn’t have the explain the mechanics of a jellyfish holding a screwdriver. (0:59)
All: Stella!! (1:01)
Andy: Really? That’s how we’re going to kill of a lead characer? (1:03)
Aaron: And thus the ecosystem of the ocean is destroyed forever.
Andy: We still have the issue of a fish city growing underwater.
Oscar: Yeah, human civilization has, like, two years, tops. (1:06)
Aaron: Wow, this is more color than there’s been for the entire movie. (1:08)
Oscar: It’s actually not Sascha, just another seahorse. (1:09)
Andy: Ugh, now we’re tampering in God’s domain. (1:09)
Oscar: Wow, we are partying like it’s 1999. (1:09)
Jackie: Honestly, that could have been worse?
Aaron: Yeah, it could have been the movie advertised on the cover. (1:10)
Aaron: I am going to sample the living shit out of this movie. (1:11)
Andy: Hey, all the YouTube clips call it “Help, I’m A Fish.”
Jackie: Do you think they changed the title and did the CGI cover after A Shark Tale came out?
Oscar: I think that’s certainly what happened. (1:15)
Stacey: If you thought Finding Nemo wasn’t multi-cultural enough, this might be the fucked up, dead fish movie for you.Two Styles of Animation.
Aaron: If you go into it expected the worst animated film, a.k.a., what was advertised on the box, in the end, you’ll be delighted. 5 Slow Motion Near Death Sequences
Oscar: Wow. I’m surprisingly unashamed of my motherland right now. 3 Children Kidnapped And Deformed By Fish-Obsessed Shut-In
Jackie: This could have been a lot worse, and was not ripping off Finding Nemo or A Shark’s Tale, which disturbs me greatly. 5 Lion King References
Andy: If the fish can get their mass transportation down in 6 hours, why can’t the MBTA? 1 Fucking Totally Civilzed Fish Colony, with Fucking Mass Transit and a Crab Army. We’re doomed.
